Okay so remember how everyone’s going crazy for 90s clothes lately? Prices are stupid high for vintage stuff. I ain’t paying that. Plus, I got piles of old tees and jeans sitting around. Time to DIY! I’m gonna make my own retro gear.
Starting Simple: Bleach Designs on Jeans
First up, I grabbed an old pair of light wash jeans. Cleaned them real quick. Then I rummaged under the sink and found a spray bottle. Filled it half with regular laundry bleach, half with water. Just like that. Went out to the backyard – ventilation, people! Sprayed the bleach mix kinda randomly on the legs. Laid them flat on cardboard, didn’t want bleach eating through my patio. Left them for maybe 15 minutes? Didn’t time it exactly, just watched the color lift.
Important Part:
- Rinsed them HARD with the garden hose straight after. Like, soaked them through.
- Then threw them in the washing machine alone with a bunch of plain water, no soap.
- Dried ’em outside. Boom. Instant faded, splotchy bleached spots. Looks like I wore them non-stop in ’94. Easy win.
Leveling Up: The Patch Jacket Situation
Found my ancient denim jacket at the bottom of a bin. Perfect canvas. Dug out patches I collected from concerts years ago (found ’em when clearing out my junk drawer) and raided my grandpa’s old button tin. Needed strong thread.
Started sewing patches on the back – painstaking! Hand sewing is slow. Needle kept stabbing me. Seriously. Decided to mix it up and ironed on a couple of smaller fabric patches I found. Way faster. Then, took some old metal buttons – this cool skull one, a random flower – and just started stitching them around the collar and down one lapel. Used pliers to shove the needle through the thick denim when my fingers gave up. Took an evening (and maybe a sore thumb or three). Finished look? Chaotic. Like I time-traveled straight from a grunge concert. Nailed it.
The Ironic Hit: A Totally “Rad” Tee
Had this plain black tee. Fine, but boring. Found a cheap stencil of that old smiley face with stars for eyes? Super 90s. Taped it down tight in the center. Bought some cheap fabric paint – bright turquoise! – at the craft store yesterday.
Started sponging the paint on over the stencil. Messier than I thought! Paint kept bleeding under the edges a tiny bit. Tried carefully peeling the stencil off while the paint was still wet… kinda smeared one star. Ugh. Let it dry overnight on the kitchen table.
Next morning, threw it in the dryer for a bit to heat-set it, crossed my fingers. Wore it out. Paint felt a bit stiff, honestly. The smear? Looks kinda intentional now, or at least that’s what I’m telling people. Neighbor kid called it “rad.” Mission accomplished, I guess?
Final Thoughts (And Mrs. Jenkins Downstairs)
Made three pieces. Cost almost nothing. They’re far from perfect. My bleached jeans look genuinely distressed (in a good way). The jacket is a hot mess of punk rock grandpa. The tee… well, the paint is cracking slightly after one wash. Whoops.
Best part? Mrs. Jenkins saw me wearing the jacket to take out the trash. Squinted hard and said, “You look like you got dressed in the dark, young man.” Couldn’t have asked for better confirmation it looked retro. If it confuses old ladies, you’re doing it right. Give it a shot. Your turn!
